Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Sleep training makes me chuckle.

And my thoughts on other parenting issues.

Disclaimer: If you do sleep train or have totally rigid schedules, I am not writing this post to say you are wrong! The opposite, in fact, this post is meant to say that everyone has their own way of doing things. I am just simply stating ours!

Actually any form of "training" for an infant makes me laugh.
I feel like I have always been honest in my blogs about being a mother and a wife, so believe me I am not going to start sugar-coating now, but I have a great baby. Sure the first 3 months were probably the hardest of my life - the sleeplessness (even when Brody slept great, I stayed up too late), the anxiety, the fighting with Corey.... but since the 4th month, it has been wonderful. Brody has slept well since he was a newborn. He naps 3-4x a day and sleeps 7-10 hours a night. We never did "sleep training" we simply put him to bed when he was tired. Did it take some time for him to be comfortable sleeping on his own, in the crib, through the night? Yep, you bed. About 2 weeks. Does he have a set bedtime? No. If he naps for 3 hours during the day, I let him. He obviously needs it if he sleeps it. So will I put him to bed at the same time that night? Nope - that will only lead to him whimpering and kicking and playing in his crib.

So we don't sleep train and you know what? We survived. Brody survived and we are happy.

I feel like moms are in a constant state of competition over what their baby's can or cannot do. My child stands. My baby walks. My baby can crawl up the stairs. My baby can surf the furniture. Guess what? Brody can't! He is 8 months old and he cannot crawl! He does not walk. He does not even army crawl! I will tell you that he can sit up on his own, he can get on all fours, and he can pull up. Babies all develop at their own rates! Your child will walk, crawl, roll, and sit up when they are ready! So no need to compete!!

Eating. I can't stand when people tell me how my child should eat. Brody at rice cereal in his bottle since 2.5 months. He had acid reflux and that worked for us. So he ate rice cereal earlier. He ate solids at 5, possibly even 4 months. Because he could. He could handle it and he did. So now when I hear people say. You can't feed him whole peas, or you should be feeding him this kind of food. I take their advice and smile and think in my head, mmm yeah, OK, were doing fine, but thank you! Brody can chew whole peas, and teething biscuits, and puffs. I think I know him best. I think most parents have a really good grip on what is best for their own child. So even if another baby is not ready yours may be in fact at that point. Don't let others make you feel bad for anything you do when you know it is right. :)

Babies grow at TOTALLY different rates. I just had lunch with a friend who was upset because someone told her her 8 week old is too small. She is eating well and growing on the same curve that she has been since birth. Her parents; 5'3 105lbs and 6'4 and very thin! Of course she will be little. She is tiny but long! SO weather your baby is on the bigger end or smaller end. Don't worry. Don't compare! Don't tell someone that their little one is too small! As long as they eat enough, are happy, and there is no other major health issues, don't worry! If we were all the same exact size and shape the world would be a pretty boring place!

That was my little rant on some issues that drive me nuts! I guess what I am mostly trying to say is stop comparing! Just because your baby can do more, does not make you a better parent or make you know more. Just because your baby does less does not make you less of a parent! Let them be babies! There will be time for rigid school competitions and schedules but for now, enjoy the baby just being a baby!


Unknown said...

And this is why I love you! I don't agree with everything you said but I think that's the point right? Every baby is different and every mother is different, so parenting will be different based on who you are and who your baby is. Never feel like less of a mom b/c of milestones. And if it makes you feel better Isabella will be 8 months on Friday and she doesn't crawl either. She army crawled for a hot minute, got over it, and then never did it again. Meh, so what? Less chasing around the house for us moms!

Annie said...

They are definitely all different - even your own kids are different. Everett was an amazing easy going wonderful sleeping baby & Aubrie was well - I'll just call her difficult - but she slept through the night the first time at 11 months. Aubrie walked at 10.5 months, Everett was after he was 1. They are still very different with everything - so comparing is always crazy b/c they are different people and they will learn and grow differently :)

Becky said...

I agree with you, people should stop compairing babies. Nick has 2 teeth and he just turned 6mnths old last Thursday. People keep saying he's too your for 2 teeth. Well they are their, they've popped through and they are really sharp, i'm not lying!! People can be real morons!

Now for the sleep training, Nick sleeps like crap from teething, so i'm going to try some sleep training techniques. Due to my husband's work schedule i'm home at night alone with Nick so it's tough on me, we'll see. He wakes up so many times at night we're all exhausted.

Leannabanna said...

E- That is totally the point! And why I love you too. You get it! To each their own. I am just sick of people telling me their way is the only way!

Annie - you are so right and that is the reason I am scared to even think about another. I am humble. I do not think it's totally Corey and I that made Brody a good sleeper/eater/happy, I know a lot has to do with his own personality and characteristics. I am scared that my next one is going to be difficult!

Becky - B had 2 teeth at 7months! I know babies that have none at 9 months and I know babies that have one at 4 months! And I know how you feel Corey works from 9-5am so I am the only one home with B at night. Sleep training was just not how I did it but many moms have so much luck with it! Good luck! Keep me posted!

Jeannie @ Living Loving Crafting said...


Phillips Family said...

Hi! I just found your blog and am so excited to start reading. Your son is a bit older than mine (and Brody is very precious by the way), I love finding baby boy blogs to follow. I seem to be surrounded by baby girls :)

My husband's name is also Cory!